Actual conversation:

Me:  Barb says there’s a Sonic by her folks’ house, kind of behind Southtown.

Jeff:  The mall?

Me:  No, that’s Southdale.  Southtown is over on Penn and 494.

Jeff:  What’s the difference between the two?

Me:  Only Southtown has been written about by The Hold Steady.

My grandparents’ neighbor, known for his collection of cars that he moved to keep out of the sun and covered in towels, huge family, beautiful lawn, and ability to never have a job.

While I remember almost nothing of her teaching, I do remember that she used her fake arm as both a weapon and an instrument to constantly pull her nasty wig back into position.

The boy my parents forbid me to see, that I dated for nine months behind their backs.  Six years older than me, was sweet and a virgin.   Years later, I finally deflowered him.

Having grown up in Kuwait, he knew violence.  Liked to make fun of the gory driver’s ed movies.  When he saw I was upset at one, tried to protect me from seeing it.

Otherwise frustrated coach and teacher with a pedistache, taught driver’s ed with an intensity that just make kids laugh at him.  Thought he was going to have a heart attack in every class.

Most chill dude ever.  Never raised his voice or used the idiot brake.  When I was going 15 over the highway speed limit, he calmly asked what I thought I should do about that.

My first friend in new school, first date, first dance, first kiss.  After that kiss, he said, “Well,that kind of sucked, didn’t it?” and called me a couple days later to break up.

Dreamed last night of putting you to sleep again; woke up sobbing.  I didn’t mean to get a cat that day, but you held my eyes across the store, and it was love.

During the height of X-Files fame, met Langly at a conference in Nashville. He seemed a little frightened of my exuberance over meeting him; I was embarrassed to wear my glasses in our picture.